Moms need more support, mental health experts say in wake of West Haven deaths

WEST HAVEN, Weber County — The death of a mother by suicide and the killing of her three children in West Haven has left a family grieving and searching for answers.

Maternal mental health experts in Utah want moms to know there is help available.

Those experts say support is best thing to help young mothers — and they want all moms across Utah to know that if they’re struggling, they’re not alone.

“It’s, of course, really hard to make sense of something like this,” said Camille Hawkins, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Co-founder of Chapters and Seasons Counseling. “I often see that parents will get a lot of support with their first baby and then with their second baby, maybe not as much and then third baby. Nobody’s there.”

As a therapist who specializes in postpartum mood disorders, she meets with women in Utah daily who are struggling while trying to care for small children.

“The postpartum period is, of course, a vulnerable time. There’s a lot going on. But even beyond that, parenthood and life is challenging,” Hawkins said.

Police have ruled the death of Maribel Ibarra and her three children a murder suicide. Her family has said they didn’t know she was suffering.

Hawkins hopes society at large can do a better job of supporting new mothers.

“I really think that what we’re missing is the village mentality,” she said. “If we are alone in our house caring for children and babies, people aren’t going to see if we’re struggling.  If we’re in a village — if we are with mothers, grandparents, aunts, nieces, nephews, then there’s more of the sharing of the load physically and logistically, but also more of people being able to check in and see, ‘Oh, wow, you know, something is seeming off.'”

Amy-Rose White is a perinatal psychotherapist and has been working in Utah for dozens of years supporting women through perinatal mood disorders.

“If you see something, say something about someone that you love. And if you don’t feel like yourself, keep reaching out for help until you get what’s actually going to be effective for you,” White said.

Not speaking specifically about Ibrarra’s case, White said that, in general, postpartum mood disorders can show up at any point during the first two years postpartum. Those mood disorders can include depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, postpartum bipolar disorder and postpartum psychosis.

“At least a quarter of all American women will have postpartum depression clinically, which often…looks more anxious, irritable, anger and rageful than it does, you know, crying under a blanket and being nonfunctional all day,” White said.

Most importantly, though, White and Hawkins say regardless of whether you’ve been diagnosed, there is help in Utah.

“Don’t give up. Help is out there. Keep trying. You’re worth it.”

Here are a few resources to help:

• Help Me Grow Utah
• Postpartum Support International Utah
• Huntsman Mental Health Perinatal Services
• Postpartum.net
• Psychology Today

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Suicide prevention resources

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or exhibiting warning signs, call, text, or chat the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 which is answered 24/7/365 by crisis counselors at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute. All calls to legacy crisis hotlines, including the old National Suicide Prevention hotline, 1-800-273-8255, will also connect to a crisis care worker at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute as well.

Additional resources

• SafeUT: Parents, students, and educators can connect with a licensed crisis counselor through chat by downloading the SafeUT app or by calling 833-3SAFEUT (833-372-3388)
• SafeUT Frontline: First responders, including firefighters, law enforcement, EMS, and healthcare professionals can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUT Frontline app.
• SafeUTNG: Members of the National Guard can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUTNG app.
• Utah Warm Line: For non-crisis situations, when you need a listening ear as you heal and recover from a personal struggle, call 1-833 SPEAKUT 8:00 a.m.-11:00 p.m., 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
• The Huntsman Mental Health Institute offers a wide variety of programs and services including suicide prevention and crisis services, hospital treatment, therapy & medication management, substance Use & addiction recovery, child & teen programs, and maternal mental health services including birth trauma, pregnancy loss, infertility, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders.
• LiveOnUtah.org is a statewide effort to prevent suicide by promoting education, providing resources, and changing Utah’s culture around suicide and mental health. They offer resources for faith based groups, LGBTQ+, youth, employers, firearm suicide prevention, and crisis and treatment options.

Counties in Utah provide services for mental health and substance use disorders. Centers are run by the thirteen Local Mental Health and Substance Use Authorities all across the state and offer therapy, substance use disorder treatment, support groups, mobile services, youth treatment, and more.

 These resources and more information can be found here: https://www.uacnet.org/behavioralhealth.

Other community-based resources

• NAMI Utah provides education, support and advocacy for individuals and families impacted by mental illness.
• American Foundation for Suicide Prevention offers prevention programs, public education, support for loss survivors, and fundraising for research.
• Encircle Utah: LGBTQ+ family and youth resource center.
• Utah Pride Center empowers Utah’s diverse LGBTQ+ community.
• The Trevor Project: LGBTQ teen resource center.
• U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs Mental Health
• Latino Behavioral Health Services
• Center for Workplace Mental Health offers suicide prevention and response for employers.