‘Our hearts ache’: Extended family of WVC murder-suicide victims speak out after tragedy

WEST VALLEY CITY — A community in West Valley City was stunned after a family was found dead inside a neighborhood home Tuesday. In days after the family was found, police released further details, unveiling an even more tragic situation than neighbors or family could have imagined.

Investigators said Wednesday they believe the tragedy was brought on by the father, Dae Reh, 42 when he first shot and killed his wife, Bu Meh, and their three youngest children in the home before shooting himself. The oldest son, Sha Reh, 17, survived a gunshot wound to the head and was found in critical condition by a family member and church leader Tuesday.

The extended family of the Rehs told KSL TV the family was originally Karenni refugees from Myanmar and escaped persecution.

“They’ve been here 10 years in Utah,” said Neh Meh Kchawtee, a relative of Meh.

Kchawtee said Meh learned English and became her family’s main provider for the last year.

“We love this family. The kids are wonderful,” Kchawtee said. “And they are perfect attendance at school and that is why they are so good at talking. Whenever we see them, they bring a smile to our face.”

The family built a community at church and with friends like Bridget Harding and Michele Schmidt, refugee host families who helped them adjust to American life. The Rehs took few pictures, but the two friends captured several moments over the years.

“We were there Friday for a few hours and honestly felt nothing but just pure love,” Schmidt said.

Friends and family members are still trying to understand what happened last weekend. On Saturday, Kchawtee stopped answering calls or texts from Meh.

“Even if she missed a call, she’d call back in a couple of minutes, so that’s why she’s very concerned when she didn’t answer,” Kchawtee said.

Kchawtee said it was a miracle that Sha Reh was alive and spent at least two days without medical attention before he was found.

“He’s been through a lot, and he is still alive, which is a miracle,” she said.

“Just sweet little tears would come down his cheek. He’s just a tender strong young man,” Harding added.

Kchawtee said the teen is responsive and showing signs of improvement.

“I think God is watching over us,” she said.

Friends and loved ones said they noticed no red flags other than Dae Reh asking them for help finding a job. Sha Reh’s birthday is on Saturday, and he’ll turn 18. His goal is to attend the University of Utah.

The extended family issued a statement on Thursday detailing the mother’s experience as a Karenni refugee and expressing their thoughts in the wake of their loss:

Like all of you, we were shocked to learn of the tragic and untimely deaths of 4 of our family members at the hands of their husband and father. We condemn all forms of abuse and violence, especially abuse and violence against innocent women and children.

The victims, their ages, and their relationships are:

Bu Meh, 38, mother

Sha Reh, 17, son

Boe Reh, 11, son

Kristina Ree, 8, daughter

Nyay Meh, 2, daughter

Sha Reh is our 17-year-old hero. He is the lone survivor in his immediate family. He has a long and complex road to recovery. He needs our full attention, our unconditional love, and the Savior’s gifts of healing and peace.

Our family is cooperating with local law enforcement to better understand the motive behind these senseless acts of violence. While the perpetrator of these heinous acts is deceased, we know that God’s justice is not.

Our hearts ache for the loss of life and potential. Bu Meh was a beautiful wife and mother. She brought light to her family. She worked hard to provide for them and to meet their needs. As a refugee and immigrant woman, she faced significant hurdles to her family’s well-being and success.

Over ten years ago, she fled a violent situation in her home country of Myanmar, where her people were being ethnically cleansed by their government. She came to the United States with her husband and young family with little more than the clothing on their backs.

Since coming to the United States, she taught herself English, learned valuable skills, and worked tirelessly to support her growing family. Her dream was to one day own her own home and to live comfortably alongside her husband and their four beautiful children.

After moving into their own home and finally enjoying a level of prosperity far beyond the nightmare of their former country or the refugee camp in Thailand in which they lived for a season, and for reasons that we cannot comprehend, her husband robbed her and their children of that security and their very lives.

However, we do not wish to dwell on the circumstances of their deaths. As a family, we have felt unspeakable peace. We have more questions than answers but our faith and our trust in a living God and in His Son Jesus Christ sustains us.

At this time of the year, we commemorate the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ. His life, His teachings, and His doctrine are the “good news”that we all celebrate. We believe with all our hearts that our loved ones have returned home to the God who gave them life.

We know they are in a state of peace, and that they are resting from all their troubles, cares, and sorrows. We know that through the power of Jesus Christ’s Atonement and Resurrection that our loved ones will one day be resurrected and that we will be reunited with them. We pray for and will live for that day.

We ask for privacy during this time of mourning, healing, and reconciliation for our large extended family. Individuals and organizations wishing to donate to help offset funeral and medical costs for our loved ones may contribute (via this) link.

Moreover, as details come together regarding a joint celebration of life for our loved ones, we will release that information to the local media.

We invite all who have been touched by this tragedy in our community and state to pray for peace. If you or a family member are in distress or experiencing abuse at the hands of a family member or caregiver, please call the Utah Domestic Violence Link Line, 1-800-897-LINK (5465)

If you or people you know are at risk of self-harm, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline’s 24-hour support. There is hope. There is healing. There is peace. Violence is never the answer and never a solution.

Lastly, as a family, we express our gratitude to the many first responders, police, health care professionals, clergy, friends, and others who have assisted and helped to care for our family members. We are grateful for you. We know that God will help carry your burdens.”

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Domestic violence resources

If you or someone you know is going through abuse, help is available.

• The Utah Domestic Violence Coalition operates a confidential statewide, 24-hour domestic abuse hotline at 1-800-897-LINK (5465).
• Resources are also available online at the Utah Domestic Violence Coalition website.
• YWCA Women in Jeopardy program: 801-537-8600
• Utah’s statewide child abuse and neglect hotline: 1-855-323-DCFS (3237)
• National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233

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If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or exhibiting warning signs, call, text, or chat the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 which is answered 24/7/365 by crisis counselors at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute. All calls to legacy crisis hotlines, including the old National Suicide Prevention hotline, 1-800-273-8255, will also connect to a crisis care worker at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute as well.

Additional resources

• SafeUT: Parents, students, and educators can connect with a licensed crisis counselor through chat by downloading the SafeUT app or by calling 833-3SAFEUT (833-372-3388)
• SafeUT Frontline: First responders, including firefighters, law enforcement, EMS, and healthcare professionals can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUT Frontline app.
• SafeUTNG: Members of the National Guard can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUTNG app.
• Utah Warm Line: For non-crisis situations, when you need a listening ear as you heal and recover from a personal struggle, call 1-833 SPEAKUT 8:00 a.m.-11:00 p.m., 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
• The Huntsman Mental Health Institute offers a wide variety of programs and services including suicide prevention and crisis services, hospital treatment, therapy & medication management, substance Use & addiction recovery, child & teen programs, and maternal mental health services including birth trauma, pregnancy loss, infertility, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders.
• LiveOnUtah.org is a statewide effort to prevent suicide by promoting education, providing resources, and changing Utah’s culture around suicide and mental health. They offer resources for faith based groups, LGBTQ+, youth, employers, firearm suicide prevention, and crisis and treatment options.

Counties in Utah provide services for mental health and substance use disorders. Centers are run by the thirteen Local Mental Health and Substance Use Authorities all across the state and offer therapy, substance use disorder treatment, support groups, mobile services, youth treatment, and more.

These resources and more information can be found here: https://www.uacnet.org/behavioralhealth.

Other community-based resources

• NAMI Utah provides education, support and advocacy for individuals and families impacted by mental illness.
• American Foundation for Suicide Prevention offers prevention programs, public education, support for loss survivors, and fundraising for research.
• Encircle Utah: LGBTQ+ family and youth resource center.
• Utah Pride Center empowers Utah’s diverse LGBTQ+ community.
• The Trevor Project: LGBTQ teen resource center.
• U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs Mental Health
• Latino Behavioral Health Services
• Center for Workplace Mental Health offers suicide prevention and response for employers.