Navigating tough conversations during Thanksgiving dinner

SALT LAKE CITY — You’re sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner and everyone sees it – but no one wants to address it.

We’re talking about the elephant in the room: People can get all riled up at the dinner table over some testy conversations and a day meant to be joyful can turn stressful and chaotic.

KSL’s Tamara Vaifanua spoke to Curtis Morley – a relationship expert and author from Alpine, Utah. He had these tips to navigate tough conversations.

First, we need to stop being nice and start being kind.

“I know that sounds opposite of everything you’ve learned your whole life but it turns out nice is the counterfeit of kind. Kind is the authentic emotion and nice is the placate the door mat that doesn’t speak truth.”

Other principles you should follow:

Learn to surrender, lean in to really learn more about the other person, let go of counterfeit emotions and build loyalty by stepping away from emotional control through manipulation.

“Enmeshment says collectively we’re going to talk bad about someone. Collectively, we’re going to hate someone. Loyalty says collectively we’re going to serve in honor even the people that aren’t in the room,” said Morley.

One last tip, Morley says hold off on getting that third plate and taking a nap so you can be prepared and make genuine connections with your family.